Part XXII

            “He just puked his guts out, Darshan!” Cee was exclaiming as Xander entered the kitchen.

            “That happens sometimes, Cee.  He’s got to push through it,” Darshan responded, leaning against the refrigerator.

            “Come on, he’s in no shape to continue.  Besides, this is only his first session.  He’s never fought before.  You could go easier on him.  And besides, I’ll be with him, it’s not like he needs to be a master swordsman right this very second.”  Cee practically stamped her foot in her fervor.

            Xander quietly placed his mug in the sink and swiftly exited the room, going back into the living room where Ling still sat, listening to Darshan’s and Cee’s exchange as she languidly flipped the pages of a magazine.

            “Sounds like you’ll be getting a reprieve, Xander.  At least for today,” she remarked.

            “I don’t know, it sounds like Darshan’s pretty set on continuing,” he replied glumly.

            She laughed lightly.  “Don’t be too sure.  Cee is nothing if not persistent.”

            “Fine!” Darshan exploded.  Xander heard the back door slam a few seconds later, and Cee came back into the living room, smiling.

            “So, Pudge, what do you want to do for the rest of the day?”

            “Um, I thought…I thought I had to…to keep…training…?”

            “Not when you’re sick, silly.  I got you out of it.  What do you say we go to the movies?”

            Xander’s cheeks colored.  “No,” he responded.

            “Well, you just think about it.  I’m going to get a shower,” she sang as she pranced up the stairs.

            Xander just shook his head.  He looked over at Ling, who was trying to suppress a smile.  “What?” he asked her.

            “Oh, nothing.  Are you feeling better now?”

            “Yeah, I feel great,” he replied.  “Thank you so much for the tea, Ling.”  He hesitated before continuing.  “I…I was wondering…”

            “Yes?” she said, looking up from the magazine at him.

            Xander stammered, “Can…can you m-make those teas…for…for anything?”

            “Well, I can’t make you a flying tea,” she laughed.  “But there’s a wide variety of things that herbs can help with.  What were you interested in?”

            “Could…you make…an…an…a-appetite suppressant?

            Ling tapped her chin thoughtfully.  “Well, yes.”

            “Could you…make one…for m-me?” 

He couldn’t meet her eyes, but he saw the sad look she gave him.  “Why, yes, I could do that for you, Xander.  I have to warn you, though, sometimes those herbs have some unpleasant side effects.”

He shrugged.  “That’s okay.”

“Hmm,” she murmured.  “I’m almost out of dandelion…and there are a few other things I’ll need to pick up.  I can have it ready for you in a few days, is that alright?”

He let out a sigh of relief.  “Yeah, that’s fine.  And…if you could…not tell anyone about it…”

She gave him a gentle smile.  “Of course not.”

“Thanks, Ling.”

            They sat there in a comfortable silence for a few more minutes before Cee came bounding down the stairs, her wet hair streaming out behind her.  “Ready to go, Pudge?”

            Xander sighed again, but said, “Can we please go back to my dorm?”

            “Anything you want, Pudge,” she chirped.

            A short while later, they were walking into Xander’s room.  He almost collapsed into his desk chair before he remembered that it was broken, and sat down heavily on his bed instead.

            “How are you feeling?” she asked him as she fingered the tag of a t-shirt that was draped over the back of his chair.

            “Just…great,” he panted.  “I can’t…even…walk up…a flight…of stairs…without…dying.”

            “I meant your tummy,” she scolded sternly.

            “It’s…better.”

            “Good.  Ling’s teas are awesome.”

            Unbidden, his request to Ling popped into his mind.  He tried to think of something else, but it was too late.

            “Pudge!” she exclaimed in dismay.  “Please don’t do that…you don’t need it!”

            He scowled.  His breath finally returning, he said, “Yes, I do…just…look at me.”

            “We’ve already had this conversation.  You are fine just the way you are.”

            “No, I’m not.  My parents –“

            “Screw your parents!  Screw everyone else!  You like the way you look, don’t you?”

            Xander’s face turned scarlet and his mouth snapped shut.

            “I’m sorry for saying it and making you uncomfortable, but it’s true.  You like being so big and –“

            “Stop!” he bellowed.  “Just stop.”  He rose from his bed and began grabbing clothing out of his dresser.  “I’m going to get a shower.”

            For once, Cee kept her mouth shut as he gathered up his things and left the room.  He made his way to the bathroom and into the last shower stall on the left, the one that had the least light.  He ripped the curtain closed and began to undress, all the while cursing the narrow width of the stall and the way his gigantic belly, hips, and ass constantly brushed into the cold tile.  You’re even too big for the showers, fatass, he told himself, feeling the contempt sizzle through his veins at the same time as a pleased flush coursed through his chest.

            “What is wrong with you?” he muttered to himself, feeling the warring emotions of hatred and desire clashing within himself.  “How can you like this?”  He grabbed a handful of his belly and shook it hard, once again feeling that heat stir inside of him. 

A tear dripped down his cheek as he turned the water on and stood under the weak stream.  More tears followed as he silently berated himself.  You stupid, fat fuck, he raged.  You’re not supposed to like being so huge.  You’re not supposed to like not being able to fit in the showers.  You’re not supposed to like the feeling of all your fat in your hands…  He instantly dropped his slick, soft, soapy belly, which he’d been holding up with one hand while the other soaped underneath it.  He pounded his fist into the wall and closed his eyes.  Why am I such a freak?

After a few moments of pondering, he sighed and continued his shower, trying to ignore the way his fat flesh jiggled with every move he made.  He rinsed off and shut off the water, and grabbed his towel, which was beach-sized so that it would fit around him.  Well, it was supposed to fit around him, but it didn’t quite make it lately.  He rubbed himself dry and quickly slipped into an old pair of boxers that were like a second skin, and a new pair of jeans and a new t-shirt that both fit more loosely.  He pulled back the curtain and stepped out of the shower stall to sit on the long bench that ran the length of this part of the bathroom and dried off his feet.  Sighing, he exited the bathroom and made his way back to his room.

He found Cee sitting at his desk, spinning around in his chair.  “Have a nice shower?”

“Yeah,” he muttered, closing the door behind him.

She hopped up and stood before him.  “Don’t be upset, Pudge,” she said, and then wrapped her arms around him in a hug.

His muscles instantly went rock hard as he felt her sink into his pillowy gut.  But thankfully, she pulled away almost instantly, her cheeks slightly pink.

“Let’s go to the movies,” she said again.  “I really want to see that Bradley Reign flick, and I know you’ll like it.”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Because I…I don’t…fit,” he said through gritted teeth as he threw his dirty clothes into the laundry basket in his closet.

“What?”

“I don’t fit in the goddamn seats, alright?” he growled.  “I haven’t for a long time.”

She came close to him again, and reached up and pushed his wet hair out of his eyes.  “They just remodeled the theater in September,” she told him gently.  “The armrests can be pushed up now.”

He stared at her, not comprehending.

“The armrests won’t be in the way.  All you have to do is push them up.”

“You mean…”

She grinned brilliantly at him.  “You can fit.”